Who (or What) Is Really Discipling You?
Most of us don’t think of ourselves as “disciples.” That sounds like something for church people in the first century. But if you slow down, you’ll realize that every day you are being discipled—shaped—by something.
Formation Is Inevitable
In Luke 6, Jesus gives us a picture of how formation works:
Discipleship leads to formation. You become like whoever or whatever you’re following. ([…]But everyone when he is fully trained will be like his teacher. Luke 6:40)
So here’s the real question: Who or what is teaching you? Not just spiritually, but through the shows you watch, the voices you listen to, the friends you hang around, and even the habits that run on autopilot.
Taking Inventory
Try this: make a list of your top three in each category:
Podcasts you listen to
YouTube channels you watch
Social media pages you visit
TV shows you watch
Places you hang out
People you talk to most
For each item, ask yourself:
“What do I believe to be true about myself after listening, watching, talking to, or being there?”
How Media and Relationships Shape Your Identity
Here’s why this matters. If one of your go-to podcasts is about investing, do you walk away thinking, “If only I could invest like them…”? Or maybe you finish a YouTube video noticing how sharp everyone looks, how polished the set is, or how naturally funny the host seems—and envy starts creeping in. (For the record, I’ve experienced both of those examples myself.)
But it can go the other way too. Maybe you hear a podcast on fatherhood and leave encouraged that you’re capable of growing as a dad. Or you meet with a friend and walk away reminded that you’re valued and cared for.
This isn’t about judging yourself—it’s about noticing patterns. The voices and spaces we give attention to shape what we believe to be true about ourselves.
That’s why asking this question is crucial. It connects directly to what we’ll explore in the next post: what we treasure in our hearts. What you believe to be true about yourself is closely tied to what you’re treasuring. And in many ways, that becomes a distinguishing mark of your “teacher”—whoever or whatever is discipling you is also teaching you what to believe about yourself.
Practicing Awareness This Week
Some of us may not even realize how much influence these voices and spaces have on us. You might finish listening to a podcast, scrolling through Instagram, or watching a YouTube channel without ever pausing to notice how you feel afterward.
This week, try slowing down long enough to ask yourself:
What thoughts am I having about myself right now?
Do I feel encouraged, hopeful, and grounded? Or do I feel behind, insecure, or less-than?
Becoming aware of your inner response is the first step toward intentional formation. You can’t change what you don’t notice. As you pay attention, you may start to see patterns—certain people, shows, or platforms leave you drained while others build you up.
Write these reflections down if it helps. At the end of the week, look back and ask: Who or what is discipling me through these everyday influences? And are they shaping me into the kind of man I want to become?